Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Anticipatory Grieving

I am watching Molly Dawg slow down like a clock winding down, ticking slower and slower...
Molly is sleeping more, a heavy peaceful sleep aided by the fact she is pretty much deaf now.
She still is enjoying her food as well as the cats' food when she can sneak it. But she no longer chews her chewies or wants to walk long distances. She has been having a few accidents in the house as well. She is an old, old lady.
I don't mind cleaning up after her. I long ago decided my furry friends were more important than my material possessions. I just hate so much to see her aging so rapidly.
Dogs are very different from cats. They age at a much faster rate, and are not as good at hiding things like cats are. Cats are rather stoic and secretive, often much more ill than they ever let on, but dogs, dogs are honest and authentic. They are what they are, nothing more, nothing less.
Molly is still having more good days than bad. She is not suffering. She still seems comfortable and happy. But I know that my time with her is getting shorter. I may have a year, or several months left, but I know in my bones that all too soon, I will have to let her go.
Tomorrow though, I will call her Dr. and see if there is any other medication to help her arthritis. Maybe if I can get the creaky bones to not creak so much she will feel a bit better and thus so will I!

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